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Dedication 2000-12-21 10:05:39
by vahman

Shoelaces are overlooked in many aspects of day to day life. They are the backbone to American society in many ways. There have been many tragedies because of unproperly laced shoes. This post is to help create a standard in the art of lacing.

Many people in this world decide to not tie their shoes, but to just have the "loose" fit on their sneakers. These individuals are sick sons of bitches and deserve to die. They were probably abused as children, and were never taught the rabbit-through-the-hole technique. I pity their families for their inane lack of respect toward shoelaces everywhere.

In conclusion: Shoelaces deserve the love and respect of every mortal that walks the land of this sick and twisted earth. Please don't disregard this important item in our everyday lives.