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kill your parents 2000-09-11 23:49:00
by obrien
ok first I have to apologize, because this is probably way too long and boring.. But I really need to vent, oh sweet jesus.

right. so yesterday my ex's band was playing a show in Tampa. He left 2 messages on my answering machine so I knew he really wanted me to go. I woke up an hour before I had to leave, threw on some clothes and went to Scooby's house. Now Scooby just fell off a semi and possibly broke his ankle, exactly what I did a few weeks ago when I fell off Chevy's roof.. so he can't walk, only hop on one foot.

anyhow. Scooby didn't want to go- his ankle hurt, Regina and Chris might be there (that wouldn't be pretty), he wanted to play Nintendo. But I drag him out of the house promising beer, and tell him that he won't have to get out of the car, we'll just say hi. he doesn't put his boots on cause his foot's all swollen and nasty.

So we get on the road and I haul ass to Tampa and just barely make it on time. But on the Crosstown Expressway the power steering fucks up. Hmm. Check the power steering fluid, and it's bone dry, so I buy a bottle. Problem solved.

Ha! So we say Hi to Kevin, fuck around for an hour, and get on the interstate at about 4 (before I can even see them play a song or two, damnit). And ya wanna know why? Cause Scooby had a "bad feeling". Driving along, the car feels kinda fucked up. It's not accelerating right and it's speeding up and slowing down of its own accord. Before I can even say, hey the car's fucked up, boom! water shoots out from under the hood. What the fuck???

We stop in some redneck town, at a gas station. The car is making some fucked up clicking noises and still smoking and starting to stink like it's overheating. Pop the hood, and lo and behold...

The radiator hose had blown and split itself clean in half. Well you can't exactly drive that way. So we sat around for a while, tried calling everyone I know (including my parents, but there was no answer), tried to find a tow truck, waited around for a while for this guy that said he'd give us a ride but who never came back- lying bastard, consider hitchhiking even with Scooby barely able to walk, until finally the mechanic from the garage next door said he'd pay to fix it, cause the hose was only about 10 bucks.. Cool! So he fixes it and we're on the road again.

By now it's about 7 or 8. We get a few miles down the road and the temperature starts to rise, so we stop at a rest area and put more water in it. What could we do? It was getting dark and we couldn't get a hold of anyone. We figured that it just needed more water, since when the hose had blown we'd prolly lost all the water.

Wrong. As soon as we got back on the interstate, the lights started dimming.. The clock stopped working. No radio, no air, no power steering. FUCK! The hazards won't even work so I just pray that no one hits my car as I slow down and pull over. I figured it was the alternator, which is exactly what the lady that stopped said... She said she'd seen the headlights and the taillights go and figured it must be the alternator. She asked if we needed a ride, and took us to the nearest phone at a deserted redneck Circle K a few exits up. If I had known how close we were to home, I woulda just asked her to drive to St. Pete, it was only about 10 miles.

But I didn't, and figured that I'd just call someone (either my mom or Scooby's roommate) and they'd have to come get us. So we try Scooby's, and it's busy. Damnit, Echo must be on the phone... So I call my house and I get no answer... huh? It's 9 on a Sunday night- where the hell are they going to go?

I was severely pissed at this time.. It had been building up all day. I was so close to hitting these bitches at the convenience store, but that's another story. Not to mention that me and Scooby were at each other's throats which is really scary cause Scooby looks evil when he's pissed and he scares me.

But what makes it all worse is that there are about 3 billion mosquitos outside. Seriously, under the streetlamp all you could see was a huge solid mass of bugs. I HATE BUGS!!!! And I was getting eaten alive, they were swarming around my head while I was trying to dial the phone and I kept freaking out and yelling and swatting at them. People prolly thought I was on crack.

So for about 2 hours I tried to call my house and Scooby's house, even Chevy and anybody else I could think of. No answer, or busy, or whatever. FUUUUUCCCCKK!

I borrowed 50 cent from the nice lady behind the counter so I could have the operator interupt the call at Scooby's, since we had no choice. And guess what.

He said that there was no conversation on the line, which meant that someone had left the phone off the hook... So scratch that idea. I keep calling my house every 2 minutes while being attacked by mosquitos. No one is answering, and I'm getting pissed. I mean, I don't answer the phone much but if someone calls and calls I'll get it because it must be important. I'm about ready to kill my dad at this point, who NEVER answers the phone under ANY circumstances. Or maybe my sister, if she's not answering the call waiting.

Finally I think of Beth... she used to be my best friend but I haven't talked to her in a few weeks cause I'm kinda pissed. She's not there, but Jacquie (her mom) is. I ask her to try calling my parents, and if they don't answer to walk down there to see if anyone's home.. I give her the number of the pay phone where I am... Which sucks because that means I HAVE to sit by the phone, and can't go inside to escape the mosquitos. So 10 minutes later I get a call from my very pissed off mom. I am not going to listen to this because I had been calling for 4 GODDAMN HOURS. She insists that she's been home all day and there haven't been any calls. Jacquie had to walk down to my house because she couldn't get through. So something's wrong with the phone.

Anyhow, I ask the lady to tell my mom how to get there and she gives very easy instructions... get off the interstate at exit whatever, go to 49th street, turn left, go to the light (there's a 7-11) and turn left and down the street there's the Circle K. not hard, but my mom and my sister are FUCKING RETARDED. I keep getting calls where either my mom bitches at me, or asks for directions again cause they're lost. STUPID PEOPLE SHOULD BE SHOT.

So they finally get there and my mom won't quit bitching. I feel sorry for Scooby who had to sit in the car with 3 bitchy females. Me and my mom are screaming at each other almost the whole ride home. She's telling me how I'm never driving again and if the car is majorly fucked up I might as well pack my bags and all this bullshit. At some point my sister admits that she had TURNED OFF THE RINGER on the phone. What the hell?!?!?!?!?!? I would have never driven after the hose blew if I had gotten in touch with my mom. Which means the car would have been at a gas station with only a 10 dollar repair instead of on the side of fucking 75 with a major repair.

Either way, they're blaming the entire thing on me, even though today I was supposed to drive to Palm Harbor today to take my GED test. Like that shit wouldn't have happened on the way there! And then I woulda missed the test and my mom would be out 50 bucks. But nooo, they refuse to see it that way.

But what they don't know is that I was so stressed out that when the car finally got fixed I backed up too fast without turning around and hit a pole. Hehehe.... *I didn't do that... Maybe someone hit it when it was sitting on the side of the road..*